Saturday, December 21, 2013

We Wish You A Merry Non-Denominational Winter Celebration

People should just wish each other a "Merry Christmas!" and drop all this silly, non-denominational "happy holidays" nonsense.

There. I said it.

I support being inclusive as much as the next American, but nobody really means "have your own solstice-holiday, regardless of your personal faith or lack thereof" when they say "Happy Holidays". What they mean is "Merry Christmas", and everyone knows it. Hanukkah ended in the evening of Thursday, December 5 this year,and Kwanzaa doesn't start 'til the day after Christmas. Today is Yule, but store-workers are still going to keep wishing us "Happy Holidays" until December 25th, when they will abruptly stop. No They're not wishing you a happy holiday, they're just afraid to say the name of the holiday they're actually talking about.

I feel like it's dishonest for stores and advertisers to wish [people a "happy holiday" when they don't even know what other early-winter holidays there are, or how they're celebrated. Store displays may say "happy holidays" in the front window, but I guarantee that the decorations they set up do not include menorahs, Kwanzaa kinaras, or Stars of David. The decorations will probably include an evergreen tree, but most people don't even know that's a pagan thing to begin with, so it hardly counts as multicultural.

There's a sign at the recycling center near where I live which tells motorists where they can drop off their "holiday trees". But let's be honest for a second here: it ain't a Hanukkah bush, and it ain't a Kwanzaa conifer, it's a Christmas tree. Reindeer were not present when Judah Maccabee drove out the Seleucid Greeks and lit the first menorah. Snowmen have nothing to do with Pan-Africanism.

So let's be done with this fake, bland multiculturalism that fails to accurately recognize anyone's holiday. Rather than acting like we're celebrating everyone equally by simply replacing "Christmas" with "holiday", let's call a reindeer a reindeer.